Relentlessly Superior.

Friday, May 20, 2005
[10:44 PM]

i think it's a real pity he's giving it up altogether. i've never seen someone so religious... and i've never heard of such concept in our religion, besides it being sinful of course. but i don't think i'm centering the world not God. God is and will always be the centre of my life regardless of anything. and i don't think by pursuing my passion i'm putting God after it. He's always before anything. He's the beginning He's the end. He's the reason why i'm here. but sometimes i think i'm neglecting Him for the world. i vowed not to skip prayers anymore but sometimes circumstances just won't allow it. and by pursuing my passion, i'm going against His law. it's not easy to be faithful and devoted but that's the whole point of living. we are not suppose to enjoy life now. our time spent here is meant for us to get ourselves ready for the afterlife. afterlife, heaven, that is where we shall enjoy. not the earth. earth is like a curse. They were thrown into the earth for not obeying His instruction. the angels were right. humans are nothing but destroyers. true enough, we are destroying God's creation. but of course, like we all know, He knows best. He knows we are gonna destroy whatever He creates. pity, out of the many He created, only a few of them is following Him. i'm not sure if i'm one of those few but i thank Him for giving me a chance to realise i'm not hopeless, that i can still hold on to Him, that i still have Him with me.

dear God, i will try my best to be devoted to You. i will work hard to earn myself a place in Your beautiful heaven. i wanna be as faithful as a man can possibly be. if only i can put everything aside and give myself to You... but this is the life that You created for me so i ask for Your guidance and light. i ask for Your hand, take me through the darkness of life. You are the only one that can illuminate the darkness, without You i will be as lost as those who don't believe in You. they don't appreciate You therefore they don't deserve anything good from You. but You are kind. our Prophet Himself didn't ask for evil to be upon them. instead they should be shone with Your light, make them believe in You and let them realise only You can guide them through the right path. dear God, i wanna thank You for helping me with the council election. i wanna thank You for blessing me with the wonderful people, my lovely friends, who helped me get through the election dilemma. of course i know ultimately it was Your help. whatever the outcome is, i know it is all for my own good. i have given it all up to you since the very first day. i believe You will give what's best for me. i trust You, my one and only God. dear God, i ask You to provide me with strength and might to live through my life with Your glory. what can i be without You... without Your love and kindness. to You Allah i pray. Amin.

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